Previously on Fangirl Follow Along I had some idea what I was doing. I had a plan. I had…

Well, nothing, really. I had a lot of grief and a lack of fucks and just… nothing. But now I’ve got a bullet journal with a post tracker and a desire to dig myself out of my grief, so going into the first holiday season without my inlaws I’m just fucking winging it.

And breaking down an EXO song released yesterday. Because why the fuck not?

So previously on Fangirl Follow Along I was exclusively ARMY (watching IDOL) and today I’m also an EXO-L.

Don’t question it. And also… don’t mess up my tempo.

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Okay, I promise to do this one time and one time only… I miss the Big Hit logo that opens BTS videos.

Alright, that’s out of my system. I won’t compare EXO to BTS from this point onward. In text. In my head, though, all bets are off.

Already trying to slay me with that good, good lighting. I do not appreciate this kind of attack on my person.

Or Chen’s hair.

More on that later, though.

Or right now, apparently, since he looks like something straight out of an 80s music video. Mullet and all.

(Really, I paused here because D.O looks focused as fuck.)

So metal.

That’s not a complaint, btw. It’s red, leather, and skulls which just gets me. Right here.

(I pointed at my heart. Which you can’t see, but my dog is judging me for. Hard.)

…daft punk vibe…

I love Xiumin’s hair in this comeback. It’s just so… fluffy.

I’m weak against Kais.

Red. Light. Love it.

And D.O gets the light treatment. I won’t survive all the members getting a slow scan.

Which is why I’m skipping to the first dance sequence.

And Kai in a fuck boi crop top, suspenders, and leather pants.

THERE IS A GOD, AND SHE PROVIDES US WITH KPOP.

Because the outfit needed another hole in it.

No, seriously… it did.

(also, why is my stupid computer not taking these images in HD?)

I’ll even forgive the bucket hat.

This time.

(side note: Kai can dance.)

Vampire Kai?

(I know it’s not, but I still hope that SOMEDAY Kpop will give me a vampire video…)

And onto Baekhyun. I am weak against Baekhyuns.

(I’ve watched this video about seven times already, and while I was okay watching it all in one go, it turns out breaking it down is way harder on my… self.)

Fingerless gloves. Why? Why is this happening to me?

(Also, please note how sweet and innocent Chanyeol looks here. Remember this moment later.)

This shot is more than I could have ever hoped for.

Xiumin’s weird distorted voice is an unexpected blessing two days after Halloween.

Oh god, not the maknae… I am weak against maknaes…

I know, Sehun, I’m disappointed in me too.

He’s like every judgemental uptight billionaire playboy from every romance novel…

This was as good a screenshot as I could grab… But it’s okay because I’m only stopping here to point out that he looks a bit like an 80s pop star. Rod Stewart or Sting or something…

Vampire Chanyeol…

This isn’t what I was warning you about earlier, btw.

D.O and Xiumin looking like they’re having a serious morning after crisis conversation.

I had previously underestimated D.O and I apologize to him and his stans for it.

Unf… Baekhyun.

I won’t make it… Especially with the altered voice.

Almost there…

(And fuck me, Chanyeol’s voice is deep as fuck.)

There it is.

And he knows it, too. Just look at him.

(And oh my god, Chen, I just cannot with you.)

Just… wait a minute… Look at his neck.

You’re welcome.

Oh look, they actually gave Lay a solid second of screentime…

I just love him in this whole scene…

Remember earlier today (Friday) when I was only 75% sure which member was which? I just went “oh, Baek’s eye”

So, EXO-L achieved.

The. Lighting.

Petition to remake Phantom of the Opera with Kai as the Phantom…

He makes it work…

I know, I’m still disappointed in myself as well, but…

(two scenes for Lay)

…I am weak to Chanyeol.

Goodness, his voice is sweet.

Cyberpunk Phantom. Just imagine.

This breakdown is my favorite part of the entire song.

Mark it.

Tag it and bag it.

Stick a pin in it.

Whatevs…

I apologize for my earlier criticism, Suho.

And the crystal clear Rubik’s cube is to die for.

Goddamn, fingerless gloves.

That lighting, though…

Freaking Baek…

He’s like an angel. Or a mannequin. Or a mannequin angel…

Wait, what was I saying?

I love the way the system glitches here. It’s the Matrix baby in me.

I am a constant disappointment to Sehun…

I love EXO choreography.

And Kai does a full-on ballerina spin, that I couldn’t capture. So get his angry serious look. While Chanyeol looks like a big goofball.

Walking away, like badasses…

A couple of more thrusts and a little posturing…

And they all drive off.

OR DO THEY?

(I just want to point out here that I do not believe for a second they all can drive…)

EXO logo

Tempo version.

Followed by the SM Entertainment logo, and… it’s over.

(oh, and in case you’re worried about Lay)

(He’s featured more in the Chinese version…)

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Tempo by EXO
Released: November 2, 2018
Album: Don’t Mess Up My Tempo
Length: 4:01
Notes: My first step into EXO-L life.
Watched Status: Previously watched. Like, a lot.
Bias: Oh, god.. do I have to. Do I have to??
Bias, second attempt: Oh, it’s gotta be Park Chanyeol
Reason: He took me by surprise
Favorite EXO video to date: Monster. But out of the ones I’ve broken down? Well, I’ve only broken down this one…

So that’s it. My first EXO breakdown. Join me next week when I break down… Probably more BTS. I’m weak and not done with their catalog.

(Edit: It was The 5th special.)

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